Ambivalence II
Sexual abuse severs the body from the spirit. The body betrays the mind, as it will respond physically to the sexual touch, despite the horror within. The desire to fight, to scream, to struggle succumbs to an insurmountable tide of fear and the body is frozen. It often cannot, will not fight back and the victim is left to sit with the shame of this apparent weakness, this incapacity or lack of desire. This misplaced guilt is a lie that weaves itself into the core of its victims and the reason shame and secrecy often compound or prolong the initial trauma. The body is defiled, trapped and despised. Punishing the body for this betrayal through eating disorders, addiction, overexercise or self-mutilation often serves as a temporary relief from the pain of this betrayal.
The Little Black Book will include a series of twenty images selected by the artist, documenting her journey through the effects of childhood sexual abuse. These images are compelling, graphic, raw and unfiltered, including excerpts from the Anger, Grief and Ambivalence collections.
The book will be bound in a hardcover material and each image will be printed onto metallic gold fine art paper. 85% of all proceeds from the Black Book will be donated to the Reset Society of Calgary, formerly known as Servants Anonymous, a local charitable foundation that actively seeks to help women desiring to escape the sex trade.